June 17 “Criticism should not be querulous and wasting, all knife and root-puller, but guiding, instructive, inspiring, a south wind, not an east wind.” RALPH WALDO EMERSON
The decision to criticize someone is always a tough call, all the more so when the person on the receiving end is a healthcare professional or a caregiver. It’s hard to be critical of doctors, nurses, and supportive family members who, for the most part, have been helpful, caring, and dependable. Rather than appear ungrateful, we may be tempted to “look the other way,” and there certainly are times when that’s the right thing to do.
We should carefully and objectively weigh the importance of the issue at hand before we actually criticize someone. It’s wise to choose our battles, so to speak, when physical and emotional energy is at a premium. Moreover, we ought to be absolutely sure that our motive for criticism is constructive, and that we are not simply being self-righteous or trying to “get even.” Once we’ve decided that something definitely needs to be said, in the interest of long-term harmony we should try to make our point thoughtfully and gently. For example, we can offer helpful suggestions along with our criticism, and we can also sweeten our words with a compliment if that’s appropriate.
THOUGHT FOR TODAY
Before I criticize I will carefully examine my motives and weigh my words.
Dorian, J.S.. Above and Beyond: 365 Meditations for Transcending Chronic Pain and Illness . Central Recovery Press, LLC. Kindle Edition.
This also reminds me of the saying "You can get more flies with honey than you can with vinegar". This was a saying my mother used to tell me when I was growing up. I also found it to be a true statement but can get a little problematic when I need to set boundaries. I don't have to be mean about my boundaries. I should never sugarcoat boundaries but stand firm with them. I can set them with love in mind. I do have to question them though; is this God's will or not? Boundaries are not for the other person but they are for me.